Randomly Kawtar

 With an emphasis on emotions, mental health, the beauty of nature and the little habits that make a life, RandomlyKawtar captures in words and photographs what it is to live, to grow, to believe and to love.

Self-Reminder: Getting Through Your Fear Is Possible. Scientifically.

      The other day, again, as I was studying I suddenly started to feel asleep and just wanted to go do something else, though a had a goodnight sleep, wasn't ill and wasn't bored either because I like what I study, so I fought with myself to not check my Instagram and then had that monologue again from wich I realized that I was actually afraid I'm not going to get all my subjects covered  in time and not ace my finals.
       So I got my calendar out and was surprised that I had enough time to revise all my lessons almost twice WITH a two weeks break in the middle, so I put up a plan, committed to it and gave myself a break to recover from the fear. :p (yeah I spoil myself haha)

     You see, now this is just one of the many times we manage to build a blocking on our own paths with our own hands.


    Scientifically "with our own amygdala", which is the tiny almond-shaped organ in the back of our brain responsible for ... FEAR. So when we encounter something dangerous, it's the amygdala that gets the signal first before the prefrontal lobes -which are responsible for rational, intelligent thinking and decision-making- , and therefore it is the amygdala that reacts first, that's why our first reactions are usually emotional and irrational, rather than logical, smart and reasonable!!

Briefly, our brain wants to protect us by sending us in a direction away from the pain point.

   As a matter of fact, getting your amygdala removed won`t solve the problem, indeed, in extreme life situations it is the amygdala that provides you with enough energy to run for your life, so the wiser thing to be would be practiscing how to amortize that first irrational response and guide it with more reasonable solutions.

    The Question remains: HOW?

STEP 1: Name and Face your Fears.

   Sometimes we find ourselves feeling anxious and fearful for some unclear reasons and it keeps haunting us, that`s why digging deeper into your feelings and realizing the reason behind it will be the first big loop to the other side of fear.  In less words, how can you winn the demon if you don`t know where it is and how it looks. I wrote a whole post about it, check it out.


STEP 2: Make of knowledge and plans your biggest Weapons.

     We agreed earlier that most of the time our fears are built up on unprecised, non-sense data, we fear things we don`t even recognize so fair enough, getting more knowledge about the subject of your fear will make this latter look way smaller and ridicoulous than what you thought it to be.

Just think of it this way: as much as we`ve learned to fear a certain subject we can learn to `unfear` it and face it with our eyes wide open.

“When you hear an airplane rumbling overhead, you can freeze, or you can take a step. And with every step you reroute the path of fear through the amygdala.”—Joseph LeDoux

        So learn about it, put up a plan & give it all you`ve got #like_a_boss :
Instead of wasting energy and time on  being scared of screwing up the speech you're supposed to give, rather spend them on learning it by heart, rehearsing it in front of close people, research public speaking methods... be smart and get yourself ready...
Bake those damn cookies with the confidence of a chef, follow the recipe word by word and look for tips from pro bakers...
Have that conversation with your parents, gently choose your words and the right time and see what happens...
Take that job opportunity even if you`re scared you won`t be enough for it, you have your degrees, so just take it and work so hard to be the best at it...

 STEP 3 : Be Open For The Outcome.

 If it turns out like you want or better  after putting yourself out there then congrats, if it turns out disastrous, then be smart and  instead of staying stuck in the middle of the mess you made and mourn on your failures, get up and between the ashes you made look for what can you take from it,  look for cues to know where did it go wrong excactly? Do you need more practice? Do you need more knowledge, more energy? Do you need to change your techniques?

        Whatever it is just give yourself a second chance and be brave one more time!!

   In both cases, it was worth it, you were brave enough to face your fears, you climbed its walls instead of  staying stuck which is such a pathetic state to be in!!

    Why not go for it and discover what happens, weren't we so curious and so  fond of surprises when we were kids? 

     Why not bring that sense of awe back? 


      Be bold, be brave or just pretend to be. Make of knowledge & progress your drugs and they'll float you to your strongest resources. Ask for help, ask for God's guidance, ask for love and give it back, it's a chain reaction, darling!! Aloha XD


Have A Fearless Life Warriors!!


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