Randomly Kawtar

 With an emphasis on emotions, mental health, the beauty of nature and the little habits that make a life, RandomlyKawtar captures in words and photographs what it is to live, to grow, to believe and to love.

ABC...G: Grateful.

"She died."

"No she didn't!!"

"Yes, she did "

"NO SHE DIDN'T, STOP TELLING ME THIS!!" screams the young lady folding in two as her sister takes her in her embrace and then out the door.

     A scream and then nothing.

     I stand in the middle of the hospital hallway under those blinding white spot lights, startled before the pain every  human can possibly encounter in a lifetime.

    An aching feeling pinchs my heart and I couldn't tell if that was empathy or was it my ego somewhat rising and I'm actually feeling blessed and lucky at this exact moment.

Maybe a bit of both.

    Blessed for having a body that does everything on its own without the need of a machine, a pill nor a person.

    Blessed for having a house to go back to at night, sleep comfortablly and wake up to the sound of birds not gunshots.

The list of blessing remains uninterrupted `til infinity.....

   And yet, yet do I manage to feel lazy to workout regulary, indulge loads of unhealthy food, waste way too much time on lazy social media consuming, sometimes behaving selfishely with the ones I care about, and yet, yet do I claim to call myself a grateful person.

  Because that night,  as more and more stretchers wheeled through the emergency room where I spent a lot of hours waiting, and as I started recalling a couple of stories I heard lately about people dealing with the darkest shades of grief (from hatred and crashed dreams to incurable diseases and betrayal), I figured two things:

   The first being the fact that as much as encountering great life struggles is considered a test to one`s faith and patience,

having it a lot better is nothing short of a test to one`s gratitude, faith and ability to actually use their privileges in a good way.

      So since I walked into the emergency room, the thing that kept running in my mind is the infamous phrase:

"I was complaining I had no shoes then I met a man who had no feet." 


    That`s where I also figured that it shouldn`t stop here, gratitude shouldn`t only imply adding 

thank yous in your prayers  (wich is a crucial thing to do) and it actually upgrades to a more practical way of life and state of mind:

Expressing gratitude means focusing on what you have and investing in your blessings to be good and do good.

   Because whoever and wherever you are right now,  there are always going to be people who  have it a lot worse and people who have it a lot better, so what you`re doing with your life should involve neither guilt nor attempt to reach the ones who have it better.

   It should only involve being grateful for your fate wich implies attempting to reach the

full potential of what you`ve been blessed with no matter how little that is, no matter how little.

How to do that?

  1.    Redefine your worth (read this);
  2. Show that you`re actually grateful for what you have by taking care of your health (mental and physical), showing interest in the ones you care about and being eager to learn, learn and learn!!
  3.    Share your blessings and use them as much as possible to help the ones who don`t have them (consider volunteering and call me to join x) 
  4.    Plan frequent visits to hospitals, shelters and orphans and be a good listener in order to discover that the things you often take for granted people would die to have.

    The Prophet, peace be upon him said,

“People are dependants of Allah; the closest to Him are those who are most useful to His dependants”


    The list of the things being grateful implies is as infinite as the blessings one. Because at some point that night I literally laughed at how ridicously blessed I was and how ridicoulous was I to not be already busy making the most of my blessings .

     That  night I also felt grateful for having four friends in medecine school, because that`s one hell of a job and I`ll be a proud little bestfriend <3

Shoutout to all the doctors in the world, be brave and be kind!!

God Bless You Sweeties!!

P.S.: It was my grandfather we took to the hospital that night but he`s doing way better now alhamdulilah and a few prayers are welcome x)