Chasing beauty with a broken soul.
Sometimes I wonder how did my soul manage to give birth to an ugly ghost within when it had the ability to experience
the warmth of Oolong tea ☕️,
the realness in the lines of a classic book, 📚
the bliss of a sunset prayer 🙌,
the reassurance in the words « I love you », ❤️
and the kisses of the sun against my skin every single day of my life? ☀️
But what came first, the birth of the ghost or the switch from experiencing to mere witnessing of life as it escaped me? What caused what?
That’s the loop I got unmercifully stuck into, and now that I’ve got nothing to lose, I am putting all my cards on the table…not to escape and deny again… but to re-start and revive and rebel and ask for love not with anger but with love.
And mostly, to not let the huge pain distract me from enjoying the little pleasures because pain is just as huge as I allow it to be and pleasure is just as present as I choose to be.
With a shaking hand, a tired soul, a blurry future and a thirst for beauty, I am reinventing myself…from the ground up.